Hold the pickles, people! It's time for another author to get grilled by the burger...and this time, it's Kieran Scott, author of the beloved (by us non-blonde ex-cheerleaders) I Was a Non-Blonde Cheerleader and its new sequel Brunettes Strike Back. So let's do a celebratory herkie
(don't freak--it's a jump--see left) then hand the megaphone off to Kieran as she takes the famed burger pop quiz...
Who is your favorite writer that most people have never heard of?
Wow. You started me off with a tough one. I am blissfully unaware of what other people have or have not heard of. Isn't that awful? But I'll give you one author I love who hasn't had a new book in a while and who young readers therefore might not know about. Barbara Kingsolver. Love everything she has ever written.
What kid or teen books rocked your world growing up?
I couldn't get enough of Little House on the Prairie and Anne of Green Gables. I loved The Secret Garden and The Endless Steppe. Later it was Sweet Valley High, and then somehow I jumped directly to Stephen King. I still don't know how that happened. The Talisman remains one of my favorite books to this day.
Describe your ideal place to
A screened in porch overlooking a lake or the ocean. I like to be by the water. I'd have a big, comfy chair and a huge desk with a flat screen monitor in front of me and a puppy at my feet. No matter where I looked I'd be able to see water. Ah, someday . . . . For right now, my cozy little office with its Caribbean-ocean-colored walls and great sunlight will do. I'm working on getting the puppy.
Your life is a TV series. Name the theme song, one event that would be on the "best of" episode, and one that would be on the blooper reel.
The theme song would be "Walking on Sunshine" by Katrina and the Waves. One event that would definitely be on the "best of" episode would be the moment right after our eighth grade musical when I had to give a "thank you speech" to the music director, who had made all our lives a living hell. I sort of coyly put him in his place while saying thank you at the same time and everyone in the audience and cast laughed. I still smile when I think about it. I mean, he was an ADULT! And we were in PUBLIC! But he deserved it and I think he knew it. For a blooper I would have to say . . . there are so many moment so choose from . . . . Okay, in college I had this boyfriend who was in a fraternity. One night my friends and I went to a party at his frat and there was this long line. A few of his brothers were on the porch and they saw me and waved me down. They were like, "Come around! You don't have to wait!" So of course everyone on line gave me these looks of death and I felt SO COOL. I knew the brothers! I was cutting in line! Look at me! Look at me! So I cockily told all my friends to follow me and started across the yard, where my ankle promptly caught on this low chain-fence thing and I flew forward and landed directly on my face. Hard. Until that moment I never really understood how someone could actually fall ON their face. I always figured your hands would have to break your fall. Not the case. It hurt like you would not believe and EVERYONE was laughing at me. I seriously could not have scripted it better.
Burger-flippers want to know: have you ever
had a job that required you to wear a geeky uniform? Details,
Oh, you have no idea. I worked at the Disney Store back in college. This was when working at the Disney Store required a girl to wear the following, (ahem): White sneakers, flesh-colored stockings, knee-length gray polyester pleated skirt, pink button down shirt, over-sized teal varsity sweater with a big M on it. Plus the nametag. Oh, and minimal makeup and jewelry. This on a girl with short hair and no chest? Very androgynous and not at all attractive. In high school I did a stint at Haagen Dazs with the white polo shirt, tan pants, burgundy apron and black baseball cap, but that wasn't quite as bad.
We'd like to name a burger in your honor.
What kind of fixins should it have?
American cheese, bacon, lots of ketchup, red onions and lettuce. Let no pickle touch my burger lest you wish to feel the full scope of my wrath!