The world can pretty much be divided into two camps: those of us who love Valentine's Day, and those of us who hate it. Of course, what camp you fall into pretty much depends on whether you're in love or WAAY out of it. The good news: we all switch camps from year to year, and if your V-day happens to be lame this year, don't sweat it--next year is sure to be better! In the meantime, for anybody who's nursing a broken heart this V-day, here's a treat that's better than any old box of chocolates: 30 Days to Getting Over That Dork You Used to Call Your Boyfriend by Clea Hantman. This isn't a novel, burgerfolk--it's a real guide to putting a breakup behind you. We asked Clea to take our quiz. Here's what she said:
Who is your favorite writer that most people have never heard of?
I feel like such a pop-culture-obsessed, limelight-focused, glossy magazine-reading, child of the 70s because mostly I read books that are – ugh – popular. Is that lame?
What kid or teen books rocked your world growing up?
Really, the classics. Every single Roald Dahl book. I just loved James and the Giant Peach, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Fantastic Mr. Fox. I loved all the Laura Ingalls Wilder books (I dreamed of living on a prairie.) Charlotte’s Web. The Littles. Later on though, when I was no longer a kid or teen myself (in years that is) I picked up Francesca Lia Block’s Weetzie Bat and it utterly rocked my world. I thought it was the most beautiful and exhilarating thing I’d read in years and it felt like it had oozed out of my own mind. After I read that, I wrote my first teen book.
Describe your ideal place to write.
Before anyone wakes up, coffee in hand, at my dining room table. Or a coffee shop, I love just sitting in someone else’s space, watching people go by and letting something someone does or something I overhear infuse my thoughts for the day.
Your life is a TV series. Name the theme song, one event that would be on the "best of" episode, and one that would be on the blooper reel.
Theme Song: Liz Phair, 6’1”
Best of Episode: Falling for my husband and having my daughter.
Blooper Reel: I have this old Jeepster and it’s kind of perfect for me because it’s almost this miniature car but one day I was meeting my galfriends for dinner and I had on these big clunky boots and I pulled into this old shut down bank parking lot and my boot got wedged between the brake and accelerator and the car thrust forward — could have been truly AWFUL had someone, anyone been near by — but instead the only thing in front of me was a 4 foot high, 50 foot long brick wall. I hit it, it rumbled and shook and then came down, the whole 50 feet of it, like some cartoon explosion, all at once, with perfectly formed clouds of dust rising in the air. It was actually rather hilarious and truly good luck that all I demolished was a wall. The bank never opened and they flattened the whole lot, so I guess in the end I did the property owners a small favor— one less thing to tear down.
Burger-flippers want to know: have you ever had a job that required you to wear a geeky uniform? Details, please!
I’m sure there is but I’ve blocked it out. Oh, I worked at Mrs. Fields Cookies in my youth. The outfit escapes me, thankfully.
We'd like to name a burger in your honor. What kind of fixins should it have?
Bacon. Ham. Cracklins. Lardons. It essentially would be a pig burger. I dream of becoming a vegetarian, but it will never happen. I love the pork products far too much.